Truth or Dare
by Arimii
Summary: ANOTHER Truth or Dare but im bored so don't care      There will be cursing and stuff later so Rated T
1. Chapter 1

Hello i know there have been lots of Hp truth or dare but i wanted to make one too

ok this is AU? Sirius is Alive and Cleared (hes a teacher as well) ( HAHAHA Sucker )

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter E-bay, and 'Dramatic Music Cues'

Warnings: none

* * *

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Neville, Luna, the Weasley twins, and Draco were the only ones left during Christmas break,sitting in the great hall, for once in Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry's history there was absolutely nothing to do even the teacher were bored, except one, Albus ( insert names ) Dumbledore.

In fact Dumbledore was scaring all those in the hall because of his twinkles, which made everyone shudder as they knew that He was planning something. Standing up Dumbledore made many groan though none louder than Snape.

" Attention I have (in my greatness) noticed that you (peasants) have been bored. So I (the Great Albus Dumbledore) propose we play a game."

Bravely (stupidly)(as only a Griffindor can), Ron stood and asked, " What Game?"

Hissing, Harry and Hermione pulled Ron down and whispered, " Ron, you IDIOT. Don't fucking encourage him!"

"Did you say something?" Dumbledore asked politely.

"N-nothing sir"

" Hmm... sure.. Anyways I ask (order) that we play -cue dramatic music- 'Truth or Dare'!"

Everyone except groaned except Luna who wistfully asked, " Where ever did you get the 'Dramatic Music Cue' Professor, the Nargles won't tell me"

" Ahem... to answer your question Loon-er- I mean Miss Lovegood I went on ~E-Bay~. "

what is this E-bay you speak of? I've never heard of such a creature as an 'E-bay'"

*Sweat drop*

"um... anyways I shall cast this nifty spell that will magically force us to tell the truth.

So gather round...gather round...no Severus you may NOT leave...I don't care if you and Harry have issues (sexual tension)...

I ask (order) that you sit Severus...

okay Minerva are you ready?"

"Yes"

"Filius?"

"Yes"

"Pomona?"

"Yes"

"Sirius?"

"YES"

"Remus?"

"Y-yes.."

"Severus? Are you ready? (you better not say no...)"

*Gulp*

"Yes I am Ready ( even though I don't wanna)"

"Good I'm glad everyone is ready...

oh and children please call us by our first name while we are playing"

-Chorus- "Yes Albus"

"Good Good you're learning (finally)... now Harry how about you start"

"Oh Okay...H- Hermione...Truth or Dare?"

* * *

ok there is is Review Please? See you Next Time


	2. Chapter 2

HIHIHI here is chapter 2 it's short i know

CST are a pain in the...

anyways enjoy

i own nothing :)

* * *

"H-Hermione, Truth or Dare?"

"Truth"

"Have you kissed anyone?"

"Yes"

"WHAT? Why didn't you tell me," yelled Ron.

"I don't have to tell you anything Ronald Weasley! Your not my mother and if you were then we should be afraid...very afraid..."

*Snicker*

"Huh?"

*Facepalm*

Annoyed Snape sneered, "Hurry up Granger I don't want to have to stay all day"

"Severus!"

"Arrg...**_Hermione_** _PLEASE_ hurry up _NOW_."

"Fine! Neville, Truth or Dare?"

"U-um D-dare! NO Wait! Truth," Cried Neville.

"Nope! You said dare first, smirked Harry.

"B-But... I … Umm... ok..."

"I dare you too..."

"say it already"

" I dare you to say something insulting to Sna-"

"Uh-hum!"

"Sorry A-Albus, Neville I dare you to insult Severus, said Hermione"

*whimper*

*snicker*

"Y-Your s-s-soo mean Hermione," cried Neville.

Still snickering Draco said, " Hurry up Neville, you have to do the dare, I thought you were a gryffindor!"

Gathering up his courage (what little he had) Neville stood up, faced Severus squeaked out, " S-s-sever-r-rus y-you a-are a-a-a... a-a-a A GREASY GIT!," then promptly passed out.

Silence.

Giggle.

Giggle.

Laughter.

And a twitching potions master.

* * *

suxs i know sorry .

but i did the best i could what with having my geometry and english TextBooks in front of me...

i HATE cramming!

umm sorry

plz review :)))


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer!::::I do not own Harry Potter, any Anime/manga mentioned and La Raza Obrera (PS if you know who they are...your awesome!)

Wow! This chapter turned out longer than I figured...cool.

(some of this was made by suggestions of my Yaoist friends and a YuriFanBoy)

* * *

"i think that this would be a bit more interesting if we had a spin the bottle type thing cause this is going to slow..." ("we just started" "Shut up ron")

"I think you might be right, Minerva?"

"Sure...Summonus Bottleus..."

"Is that a real spell?"

"The creator was lazy..."

"and the writer..."

"Shut Up don't insult her!"

"Haha your screwed Ron...cause Severus just spun the bottle...and it landed on you..."

"Shit!"

"Well...well...Mr. Ronald...truth or dare..."

"Truth..."

"Tell us your most secret crush that you would never admit to anyone..."

"Marcus Flint..."

Choking was heard all around the table. Draco laughed hysterically, and Snape gave a shark like smirk. Even Neville who had woken up a bit earlier, started to laugh...

Ron spun the bottle, which landed on Snape, gulping Ron asked, "truth or dare?"

"Since I rather humiliate myself than tell YOU something about myself, I pick da *ahem!*Truth...'i hate you Dumbledore.'

"Do you ever wash your hair?"

"RON! That was a sucky question!"

"Yes I do...daily, but the potion fumes make it pointless."

"oh..."

Severus spun the bottle, and landed on Harry. (the bottle not Snape! Jeez!)

"truth or dare?"

"Truth..."

"Tell two things no one at Hogwarts knows..."

"ummm...hmmm...i can speak multiple languages, and I like Yaoi"

Hermione shouted, "YOU DO? OMFG! I do too! Whats your Favorite? Do you watch Anime?"

"My favorite is Kaikan Fortune..."

"OMG! I read that I love chapter 3!"

"*snicker* me too and yes I watch Anime."

"REALLY? Like what?"

"Vampire Knight, Kyo Kara Maoh, jubei-Chan, Bakuman, and GTO."

"GTO?"

"Great Teacher Onizuka...After this is over ill let you borrow the manga series, oh and did you know that electrical items work in the R.o.R."

"Really! Yay!"

*Ahem* Can you spin already?

"Oh sorry..."

harry spun the bottle and landed on Parvati, "Truth or Dare..."

"Dare"

"I dare you to make out with your sister for two minutes without stopping..."

"Nice...Harry"

"Fine..."

Parvati looked into her sister's frightened eyes, apologetically, and began to kiss her. Padma slowly began to get into it and they went at it for over three minutes when finally McGonagall had enough and coughed. "Thats enough, girls..."

Blushing deeply Parvati spun the bottle which landed on Draco,

"Truth or Dare?"

"Truth"

"Tell us your inner most secret."

"In the muggle world I work at a place called Dragon's Temper..."

"Ah! So that was you!"

"Harry?"

"And Pray tell, Harry Potter, what were you doing at a gay bar?"

"Umm... damn! I'm gay... and PRAY TELL, Draco Malfoy, what are you doing working at a gay bar?"

"im gay too."

"OH SHIT!"

"Really?"

"Really? 'Ry?"

"Yeah 'mione."

"Who?"

-Whisper-snape-whisper-

"HOLY MOTHER OF!"

"shush!"

"Hermione?"

"Shut up Ron!."

"Anyways can we continue?"

"Actually I think we need a break, come back in an hour, shoo, shoo"

"okay Albus"

"Professor Snape?"

"What Mr. Potter?"

"Can I talk to you in private?"

"Follow me."

-What followed could only be classified as grade A smex, but for yonder it has been censored...cuz I'm lazy so bleeh! XP-

An Hour Later...

"Hermione? Can you please stop giggling like that?"

"Shut up, Ron."

"okay..."

"Hey Harry!"

"What 'Mione?"

"Did you know that the R.o.R has a camera system that can look into any room."

"No I didn't...oh shit! You mean..."

"Yeah...*giggle* -Whisper(of doom)-I didn't know you were a screamer-Whisper(of doom)-

"HERMIONE!"

"What?"

"Don't say that"

"Eh? Why? these prudes don't know what I'm talking about...well...maybe Luna...but that's it..."

"Yeah...the swinklebombs are very vivid at explaining..."

"Anyways who's next?"

"I think it was Draco..."

"Yes!"

Draco Spun the bottle, which landed on...

Hermione.

"Truth or Dare."

"Truth"

"Tell us something no one knows, only you."

-ron perks up-

"umm... I like the color black."

-falls-

"really? Cool..."

Hermione spun the bottle, that landed on Harry.

"Truth or Dare?"

"Truth"

"Do you know about the game?"

"Wha? Oh! Dammit 'mione! I just lost the game!"

Silence.

As most were confused then, neville stood up and shouted,

"Goddamnit! I HATE YOU POTTER!"

"Neville?"

"Shut the hell up Ron!"

"Neville...i can not believe that you out of every one in this room would get that..."

"One of my cousins lives in the muggle world..."

"oh..."

"Spin already.."

Harry spun the bottle, which landed on Dumbledore.

"Yay ME!"

"Lucky..."

"truth or dare..."

"Truth."

"Are your lemon drops laced with anything, and is that why your eyes twinkle so much?"

"There are different versions, some have,...-McGonagall perked up- la coca la mota, el crystal, la chiva, el cemento, el tiner, el crab, awarar, resistol, tambien pcp, caldo de sopilote,y hongos allucinantes.

…. -McGonagall slumps in defeat-

….

….

….

"Was that Spanish?"

"y no tienes de perikito?

"a mi no mas me gusta lo que apendeja, asi que no me apantalles, pinche bato hediondo.

"A viejito, hijo de la corneta"

"harry you speak Spanish?..."

"Albus...can I have a lemon drop?"

"Yeah me too."

"harry? Hermione?"

"I think I would like to try it too."

"LUNA?"

"Sure..."

"ALBUS!" x3

"Damn, later kids, when Minnie, Remy and Siri aren't here..."

"no you won't"

Harry looks at Remus and Sirius, opens his eyes wide and teary and whined, "Pleeeeaaasseeeeee...Ccccccannn I have a lemon drop...Reeemmmiiii...Siirrriuuus..."

"Absolutely Not."

"Severus?"

"Sevvy?"

"no."

"But."

"No."

"FINE! Two months."

"GEH! Please...im sorry harry...you can have a lemon drop..."

"Yay!"

Harry ate the lemon drop.

"Anyways Alby! Is that why your eyes twinkle so much?"

"No, I use a spell..."

"really? What is it..."

'Twinklus Oculus..."

"The writer is being lazy...again..."

"Ron...just shut up...go sit in the corner..."

"That Uchiha from that one Ramen show is there..."

"Kick him out..."

"okay...Shoo...shoo...leave Emo kid! And clean up the blood!"

"but the Emo corner in the Ramen show is occupied by this one blond kid...with a superiority complex from that one Sailor moon-wannabe show..."

"Kick him out...leave...or go home and post pics on MySpace and horrible poetry on LJ."

"Fine..."

"He forgot his 'Nah...roo...toe...Photo collection...eww...it has pictures of a guy naked."

"What? Where?"

Ron was slightly scared as, Hermione, Harry, Draco, Luna and Susan shouted out, he dropped the album on the table and scooted back as all five of them grabbed it and went to go sit in the corner.

Everyone else was slightly freaked out except Albus who was amused, and Severus who only sighed as if he was used to this kind of behavior.

That didn't stop them from flinching every time one of them let out a hysterical giggle.

After a while all of them came back, each with a copy of the album, each looking rather flustered.

"i-i believe its your t-turn Albus."

Dumbledore spun the bottle so fast it spun off of the table, hitting ron in the face.

"You pissed the author off.."

"Truth or Dare?"

"Vero...(true/truth)"

-Bad Subtitle- *Dare*

"subtitles...hmm...i didn't know they could do that...thank god...nobody here speaks Italian, jeez your stupid RON!"

"Okay so Dare..."

"I dare you...to...hmmm"

harry: -Whisper-Whisper-

"Wow your smart Harry...Anyways ron I dare you to drink this...thing...that Harry bought from this creepy guy with glasses and a notebook in Diagon alley for a galleon...so you better finish it..."

"W-what is it?"

"Inui's special vegetable/fruit smoothie mix version 666."

"do I..ha..."

"yes."

"But it's GLOWING MULTIPLE COLORS!"

"wow your so wimpy"

"am not!"

"holy shit the smoke turned to glass! how the..."

"then prove it..."

"fine"

…

…

…

…

"is he dead?"

"What?"

"I SAID IS HE DEAD?"

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU, HIS SCREAM MADE ME DEAF! HE LOOKS DEAD WHY DON'T YOU CHECK!"

"I DON'T HAVE A STICK!1"

"Isn't that exaggerating? I mean his scream wasn't that loud."

"thanks Draco...ruining that perfect joke we had..."

"yeah...anyways I think we should just leave him...he's breathing."

"damn...can we put his hand in warm water?"

"sure!"

"ALBUS!"

"what?"

"don't you dare!"

"spoilsport..."

"what did you say?"

" I love you?"

"HAH I knew it! yes! Hermione, I win the bet! Give me my money!"

"Shit"

* * *

okay the Spanish part I based it off a song from la raza obrera... again if you know who they are. your my best friend..best of all best friends!...

Anyways I don't like the Emo, I do like Shugo Chara but not Tadase stupid emo-kid( I do like it but have you seen the stick thingy that Amulet Diamond uses for Starlight Navigation? It looks like a version copied from Sailor Moon-In the name of the moon! I Shall Punish you!-)..., I love Tenipuri too!especially RYOMA-SAMA!have you seen him in 'Prince of Naniwa'? Fucking awesome!1

An for those who now hate me cuz you lost...tough luck! I can and WILL put in random memes that pop into my head...-i WILL mention at least once...a cake...the day of fries...and goof'd-ness ~desu.- (((((just don't back trace me...)))) ((((((or call the cyber police...? ((((((((do you call them? Or do you have to send them an email? Since they ARE cyber?))...sorry..Sugar can do some crazy shit to you...

I will set Yagyu Jubei (the old ugly one! Not Bon-Bon-Jiyu XP!)) on you if you don't review!

And I wont upload another chapter...~desu.


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